Aaaah. I had two numbers under Ciaran's name in my mobile, and they only differ by 2 numbers at the end. So stupid me, I forgot which one was actually my cousin Ciaran's number. So I always end sending the message to both numbers just in case. Eventually I deleted the number that clearly wasn't his, and was pleased with this.
However! Let us track the CRAZY conversation I get from the other number:
Crazy fecker: I love u so much im on a horn i need u
Crazy fecker: So dat means ul ride me wel hav red hot steamy sex by the way wat age ar ya and can u send me a picture i forgot how sexy u look
Me: Ah come now whats all this malarky about? Who are you?
Crazy Fecker: What the fuck is malarky im the lad u sent the message to
Me: What message? I must have mixed up a number or something. We dont know each other, lets continue on with our lives...
Crazy fecker: Not a chance my love send me dat picture beacuse me lad is startn to shrink
Me: No this is a freak accident, u aint gettin no picture boy! Now feck off with ye.
Crazy fecker: My life cant go on without u and dis is no acident its destiny.
Me: No it's either an accident or ur stalkin me. Now shoo! I'm sure there's a few willing females around u. Bother them some and leave me alone.
Crazy fecker: I cant my love and im bored of dem bitches i bet ur name lisha or sumtn long dem lines.
Me: No, my name is Ariel now let's end this dull game. I tire quickly of these ventures. Toodles.
Crazy fecker: My fone seems to be vibrating like an earthquake wich has stimulated my nut sak quik im bout to blow my load send dat picture if u wud like help.
Eh... no. I left it at that. This is a bizarre waste of my time. I could be... well, I could be doing *something* other than chastise some 16-year-old with my superior language skills. Bwah ha.
And you see, this is perfect example of why you didn't get a text back, Alison. THIS is what men do with their time.